again

When you stop doing something, it is so difficult to begin again.  They say that, if you have learned to play piano, your fingers will remember the smooth white and black keys, recalling the shape of chords, the flow of scales, the nuances of modulations.  Perhaps this is true.  Although I have not played piano for years, I can still recall the movement my fingers would need to make in order to call forth the sound of familiar songs.  Yet, seat me at a piano with a sheet of music in front of me, and I guarantee that I would sound no better than the fourth grader I once was, fumbling my way through a song, attempting to translate the series of lines and dots on a page into music.

I really like things to come easily.  Beginning anew takes work, energy, the willingness to learn again, try again, fail again, succeed again.  I also feel that in order to begin again, one must commit to consistency.

I want to be consistent.  A few years ago, a dear friend and mentor told Jordan and me that consistency is what matters when one is trying to live a meaningful, effective life.  We simply cannot all do everything perfectly all of the time.  But, we can choose to do a few things well.  It is this consistency, this willingness to commit with rigid determination to values, to people, to dreams and hopes, that others will notice.

I am, at the very least, consistently attempting to be consistent.  That's a start, I suppose.

All of this is to simply say that I am going to start blogging again.  I am determined to do so with some regularity.

Why blog?  I've been asking myself this for years.  Ok, really more like months.  The word "blog" makes me inadvertently wrinkle my nose.  But, this is the world in which we live.  It is one that is increasingly impersonal, but, oddly enough, one in which the personal opinion, style, and day to day life of individuals known or unknown fascinate us.

I read a lot of blogs.  I draw a great deal of inspiration from the things that people share.  I have learned that having a jar of fresh flowers in my home actually refocuses my mind on the beauty of the simple.  I have learned that I can DIY most things, with a little research and a lot of determination.  I have learned that I love photographs, words, patterns.  I love making the ordinary a little more special, a little more intentional.

As it is, blogging is a way for me to share tidbits of my life and to express myself, the things that hold my interest, the people and words and images that inspire me, the values I cannot shake.

In the coming weeks and months, I'll be converging my blogs into one.  I hope that this space will, in some way, live up to its name.  I need it to be a space in which I learn to try and fail, to openly demonstrate my shortcomings, to accept that my photographs will not be heartbreakingly beautiful, all my words will not be profound, and my knowledge of HTML code is dismal.

So, here we go (again).